“I Don’t Want to Go Back to Nigeria”: Chimamanda Speaks About Her Son’s Death

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has spoken publicly about one of the most painful experiences of her life, the death of her 21-month-old son, Nkanu, and how the loss has changed her relationship with Nigeria.

In a recent interview with The New York Times, the Nigerian author opened up about her son’s death, the medical treatment he received and the ongoing questions surrounding what happened at the hospital.

Nkanu, one of Adichie’s twin sons, died in December 2025 following a medical emergency at Euracare in Lagos. According to Adichie, Nkanu initially developed a fever and was given antibiotics. When he did not improve, she and her husband, Ivara Esege, took him to the hospital for further examination. The child was later sedated with propofol for an MRI. Adichie said he suffered cardiac arrest after the procedure and died the following day. She recalled a doctor approaching her after the incident and saying that Nkanu had been given too much propofol.

That account is now part of a dispute surrounding her son’s death. The circumstances are being examined through a coroner’s inquest, while the hospital has disputed allegations of medical negligence. No final finding has established responsibility for Nkanu’s death.

The interview appears to be about more than simply recounting the circumstances of Nkanu’s death. Adichie spoke about grief, motherhood, Nigeria’s healthcare system and what it means to lose a child in a place that once felt deeply connected to her identity.

Before Nkanu’s death, Nigeria was central to Adichie’s life and writing. She described it as the place that gave her “everything” she needed to become the writer she is. But losing her son there has changed that relationship. Asked whether Nigeria still felt close to her heart, she gave an answer that many Nigerians will find difficult to read:

“My feelings toward Nigeria have changed.”

Then she added:

“I do not want to go back to Nigeria.”

Nigeria was not simply the country where Nkanu died. It is now associated with one of the worst moments of Adichie’s life and with unresolved questions about the medical care her son received. She said her children could potentially be the only reason she would consider returning. Her daughter, she noted, still sees Nigeria as her “happy place.”

That makes her decision even more complicated. For Adichie, Nigeria can simultaneously be the country that shaped her, the country she has written about extensively and the country that now carries one of her deepest sources of pain.

She also spoke about the strange reality of grieving a child. “I still can’t believe we’re talking about my son who died,” she said, describing the feeling of going through something while also feeling as though she is outside of it. 

For now, the questions surrounding Nkanu’s death remain before the coroner’s inquest. But regardless of what the eventual findings say, the loss has already changed the way Adichie sees Nigeria.

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